Listen, I love my kids more than anything in this world. I would take a bullet for them. But I also don’t miss them when they go to bed. Now that they are home for the summer, I have two choices: occupy them, or let them wreck my house for two months. 

As a mother of five, I thrive in what I like to call, “controlled chaos.” In other words, I accept the fact that this season of my life will never not be chaotic, so I just work the mayhem into the schedule. I’m also a bit of an old school Mom in the fact that I’m not trying to create fun for my kids everyday, and I have total faith in their imaginations. 

After almost two decades of motherhood,  I’ve learned that our family is a lot happier if I toe the narrow line between providing some structure and encouraging self-sufficiency. Now that my younger three are school-aged, I’m kicking it into high gear and declaring this THE SUMMER OF INDEPENDENCE! 

Here's my plan, y’all let me know what you think:

It's on the list.

I live and die by my to-do list, so I got really excited about this one. I made a daily to-do list for each of the littles. I found a blank template online that broke the list up by morning, afternoon and evening. It was super simple and took me 30 minutes to create all three lists.  I get a little tired of repeating myself at least three times every morning, did you brush your teeth? Did YOU brush your teeth? Did YOU brush YOUR teeth?  Those days are gone. It’s on the list. I’m no longer saying “walk around the whole house and make sure all your stuff is put away.” It’s on the list, twice a day. 

On alternating days, each of them will be responsible for helping me make lunch. (Hello, life skills!)  I also included two daily chores for each kid, one in regards to their personal spaces, and the other is oriented to the shared areas of our home. For example: when my son vacuums his bedroom, he’s also vacuuming the hallway that leads to his bedroom. I’ve also vowed that this is the year we stop leaving globs of toothpaste in their bathroom sinks, but we’ll see how that goes! Before you start thinking I'm a total slave driver-fun sponge, their lists will take them a total of 2.5 - 3 hours spread throughout the entire day. It’s  mostly things they are doing anyway, but it keeps me from barking orders all day.  

They are fine, y’all. Please don’t call Paw Patrol. 

Leave the “summer sliding” for the playground. 

This is a big one. Ever heard of the “summer slide?” It’s a term used to describe the significant amount of knowledge that school aged children lose over summer break– which is sometimes even as drastic as a  20-30% decline in both math and reading skills. In my experience,  the only way children succeed academically is when they are motivated to take responsibility for their achievements. The good news is, there’s a lot of fun programs and incentives out there to inspire your kids to read this summer. Definitely visit your local library and sign up for their summer reading program, but here’s some other cool programs to sign up for too. 

Scholastic Summer Reading

The Pizza Hut BOOK IT (Yes! It’s still a thing!) 

Barnes and Noble Summer Reading Program

Did I leave any out? Let me know! I have two 30-minute reading sessions on my kids’ daily schedules: one in the morning and one at night. Will both of these happen every single day? No, but the expectation is there, and I plan to reward them very well. 

Save that for a rainy day!

As a reward for playing my to-do list game, I’ve vowed to do a little something special with them every day. Whether it's a picnic, farmers market, going for a walk at the park, or spending the afternoon in the pool, we’re going somewhere for at least an hour or two, weather permitting. 

But what about the yucky days when it’s raining or 1000 degrees in the shade? I’m in the process of creating rainy day boxes for my kids. They’ll have games, craft supplies/projects and other items that they ONLY have access to when we can’t be outside. 

Don’t you dare tell me you’re bored, my little darlings. Grab a rainy day box!  I love dollar store crafts, because they are no-prep and CHEAP. I also took advantage of my kids bringing home their pencil boxes from school, and I made all three of them their own kit with scissors, glue, crayons and markers. No more squabbles over little brother leaving the lids off all the markers. He’ll likely be coloring with unsharpened pencils by the end of the summer, but so be it. 

Get packing! 

I started doing this with my older girls when they were around 6 and 8, and it worked like magic. Before a trip, I made them both a list of things to pack, eight shirts, six shorts, etc. Then they’d bring me their suitcase, and we’d check the list off together. It only took a couple of years before they got the hang of it and started making their own lists–I didn’t even have to mention it! 

My 16-year old still ritually brings me her bag before we go away,  just to be sure. It’s adorable, but she hasn’t needed my help for several years. I plan on starting this with my 7 year olds when we are packing for vacation later this summer. It’s a huge weight off my shoulders and a great way for them to learn a little responsibility! 

Honorable mention.

I bought these food baskets earlier this year and it’s changed my life. I’ll either line them with a paper towel or wax paper and there’s zero clean up. The kids use them all the time!  It’s amazing. 

We’re only a few days into THE SUMMER OF INDEPENDENCE, but so far so good. The lists have allowed me to work a few hours and not get too many interruptions or answer a million questions. As I write this I’m listening to the sounds of my 7-year old loading the dishwasher. Don’t get me wrong, my ears indicate that I may not have any plates left in one piece when she’s finished. Also her older sister just yelled something about her flooding the whole house, so I need to go now. Wish me luck, it’s going to be interesting!

I want to hear from you! I’d also love to hear other suggestions for games that combine learning and playing. What have you done to encourage your kids to be independent? 

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